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Fehren
03-31-2002, 09:44 PM
Do you keep falling asleep in meetings and seminars?
What about those long and boring conference calls?

Here's a way to change all of that.

1. Before (or during) your next meeting, seminar, or
conference call, prepare your "Bullshit Bingo" card by drawing a
square ... I find that 5" x 5" is a good size-and dividing it into
columns - five across and five down.

That will give you 25 1-inch blocks.

2. Write one of the following words/phrases in each
block:

synergy, strategic fit, core competencies, best
practice, bottom line

revisit, desired results, 24/7, out of the
loop, benchmark

value-added, proactive, win-win, think outside the
box, fast track

result-driven, empower (or empowerment), knowledge
base, at the end of the day, touch base

mindset, client focus(ed), ballpark, game plan, leverage.

3. Check off the appropriate block when you hear one
of those words/phrases.

4. When you get five blocks horizontally, vertically,
or diagonally, stand up and shout "BULLSHIT!"

Testimonials from satisfied "Bullshit Bingo" players:

"I had been in the meeting for only
five minutes when I won."
--Jack W., Boston

"My attention span at meetings has
improved dramatically."
--David D., Florida

"What a gas! Meetings will never
be the same for me after my first
win."-Bill R., New York City

"The atmosphere was tense in the
last process meeting as 14 of us
waited for the fifth box."
--Ben G., Denver

"The speaker was stunned as eight of
us screamed "BULLSHIT!" for the
third time in two hours."
--Kathleen L., Atlanta

Dharrk
04-01-2002, 01:47 AM
HAHAHAHAHA

Grimthorn
04-01-2002, 01:52 AM
I did this once in a staff meeting...

"Let's proactively leverage our synergies 23/7 so that we may create a win/win scenario for our stakeholders and our customers."

BINGO!!!

Lilcix
04-01-2002, 11:30 AM
You mean BULLSHIT!!!! ;)

Mkai
04-01-2002, 12:51 PM
LMAO!!

Grimthorn
04-01-2002, 03:07 PM
No.. you say "Bingo"

1) You get in trouble for jumping up and shouting bullshit at the guy who signs your paychecks...

2) If you yell "bingo", not only are you 'paying attention', but you are tricking your boss into thinking that you are vocally agreeing with what he's saying, thus appearing to be MORE of a 'team player'.

Grimthorn
04-01-2002, 03:08 PM
The above is true, but you also run the risk of being assigned to a "Quality Task Force" in charge of implementing a "Bingo for success!" campaign. (and don't think I'm kidding, that really HAS happened)

Lilcix
04-03-2002, 09:51 PM
Your meeting would be so much more interesting if you shouted "Bullshit!" though. Not to mention suspence to hear
what your boss has to say afterwards~

Grimthorn
04-04-2002, 12:54 AM
I can tell you what he'll say...

He won't fire you..

He'll put you on the United Way committee...

You'll quit in a week.