Nothing to read here! Just stealth PLing post count!

[Peotr]

I am powerleveling my post count - because I think PL'ing postcounts is immature, and I've never done it before, and for some reason I want bright, flashy, twirly stars.

And I want a Vette.

-- Peotr

[Peotr]

So far, so good.

[Peotr]

My evil plan goes undetected!

[Peotr]

*rubs hands gleefully*

Soon, bright spinning stars shall be MINE!

MINE!

AAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

[Peotr]

Since no one is reading this thread, I would like to take the time to say a few things that have been on my mind::

1) My penis is incredibly small.

2) I have no life, so my penis size is irrelevant.

3) From this comes the saying, "Having no life means never having to say you're sorry about your small penis."

4) Abstract proof of no life is that I am posting to a board that no one reads in an effort to stealthfully powerlevel my post count and eventually take over the world. Once I have the highest post count dogs will like me, children will love me, and chicks will crave my attention. And then - THEN - well... I'll have to invest in one of those Swedish penis pumps, because my penis is actually really fucking small. But first, POST COUNT MUST GO UP!

[Peotr]

This is working really well!

I may have to stop to masturbate.

[Peotr]

.


. . .


.




. . . .



Aaaah! That was good. 30 seconds.

[Peotr]

A modest goal - tonight, I shall reach 100, and then rest.

I will dream about attention-craving chicks, about healing so well that someone tells me, "Hey, good job on the healing, Peotr!" and about a new surgical method that dramatically increases penis size, but only if your penis is small to begin with. I will have a Corvette, and life will be good.

[Peotr]

I AM A FUCKING GENIUS!

I AM FUCKING AMAZING!

I am the stainless steel spork. I am wrinkle-free. I am the self-cleaning oven, baby, and I'm cooking it up for you.

I am bad - I am nationwide.

If ingenious post-powerleveling were merchandise, I would be trademark. I would be franchise. I would be on every streetcorner in every store.

[Peotr]

Muskrat, muskrat candlelight
Doin' the town and doin' it right
In the evenin'
It's pretty pleasin'

Muskrat Susie, Muskrat Sam
Do the jitterbug out in muskrat land
And they shimmy
And Sammy's so skinny

And they whirled and they twirled and they tangoed
Singin' and jingin' the jango
Floatin' like the heavens above
It looks like muskrat love

Nibbling on bacon, chewin' on cheese
Sammy says to Susie "Honey, would you please be my missus?"
And she say yes
With her kisses

And now he's ticklin' her fancy
Rubbin' her toes
Muzzle to muzzle, now anything goes
As they wriggle, and Sue starts to giggle

And they whirled and they twirled and they tangoed
Singin' and jingin' the jango
Floatin' like the heavens above
It looks like muskrat love

La da da da da ...

[Peotr]

Chocolate chip cookies are ok. Macadamia nuts in cookies are fine. Oatmeal cookies are fine. Sugar cookies are fine. Chocolate-chocolate chip are really good, and cookies with coconut are my favorites, as long as they aren't macaroons.

But I really love peanut-butter cookies. Which is kind of funny, since peanut-butter cookies aren't really well-known outside of the US and Canada. I had a friend from Germany who was visiting, and my aunt made peanut-butter cookies, with the trademark thatched-fork pattern on top, and he had one, and looked at me, and said, "These taste like shit!"

So later we made him eat corn-on-the-cob.

[Peotr]

I wonder how many women I will crave me once I rule the world after this post-powerleveling effort?

It seems promising so far. I am very excited. I used to think that kindness, thoughtfulness, humor, a good taste in wine, a clean smelling garbage disposal and a basic understanding of how to cook rice were the keys to a woman's heart. But I was wrong, so wrong!

IF ONLY I HAD KNOWN!

[Peotr]

- I have turned a corner

- I have come to a deeper understanding

- I don't actually have to write anything!



Zen

[Peotr]

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ><::::*>

[Peotr]

Proof!

[Peotr]

Powerlevel Haiku::

Steathfully I post
Stars and women adorn me
Fed Ex penis pump

[Peotr]

Ugh.... Only 71, this is much too slow.

[Peotr]

Well...

It is late. And I must sleep. Powerleveling will, perhaps, take longer than I thought. But all things worthy are worthy of effort. I am undaunted.

Tomorrow I will return.

[Peotr]

Just one more...

[Peotr]

Another quicky...

[Peotr]

Must ... get ... new ... star

[Peotr]

Huzzah! I am first on page 2!!!

PWN!

Of course, this is totally my own thread, but it is still a victory~


-- Peotr


(To the tune of "Onward Christian Soldiers)

"Onward weeeeenis poooosters, posting on these boooooards!
I powerlevel my pooooost count for dancing stars galooooooore"

[Peotr]

What is exceptionally creepy about this?

Someone else is viewing my posts!

I think..... Maybe not. Maybe it's just me.

[Peotr]

-- Note:

If this is someone from waaaaay, waaaay, waaaay back in the days of DAoC Hoss, well, you knew me as:

Wheet Wonderful, Boy Cleric of Albion!

or even earlier as Umber, druid from Sol Ro / Ayonae Ro. And yes, I'm pathetic, I restarted in EQ, and am now a cleric in Hoss....

-- Peotr

[Peotr]

78 - looking good.


I sense that soon, soon, babes will begin to notice me.

Maybe even today at work.

-- Peotr

(not that we have babes where I work)

[Peotr]

Trying to figure out if someone else has read my powerleveling thread ....

I am concerned - my plans for shiny stars, world domination, and feminine attention could be spoiled by someone actually viewing these threads.

Mentally, I try to calculate how many times I have viewed these threads or edited these threads, but the only thing that comes to mind is that it would be intensely pathetic and a bit masturbational to have gone back and viewed, let alone edited, anything in a PL thread.

But, I am anal retentive.

[Peotr]

Of course, this thread could be considered in an historical context - once I am supreme ruler of the shiny stars, women will want to know when it all happened, where it all started, who put to mojo in the Shhprong House, as it were... And then, THEN, this whole thread will become part of our National Culture.

Yes.

Thats why it's important that this thread remain ... uhh...

-- Peotr

Note: Much editing to do. But first, 100 posts!

[Peotr]

Of course, I could also be schizophrenic, or somehow insane, although not psychotic, certainly. Just dillusional. But that doesn't seem likely, and according to the literature I read, I wouldn't know if I was anyway.

Note: Best to just continue as normal.

[Peotr]

While posting to this thread I had a great idea - small, miniature fortune cookies would make a really cool breakfast cereal.

FORTUNE FLAKES! Positive thinking from a positive breakfast!

However, I must work out how to keep the tiny fortunes from turning all shitty in milk. That would suck.

[Peotr]

-- Originally posted by Seanreisk (thats me)
"Note: Best to just continue as normal."

Profound... The implications that musings in a hidden powerlevel thread could be construed as normal makes me ...

Think deeply...

[Peotr]

Now, if this were theBlack Hole (http://www.space.com/sciencefiction/movies/black_hole_retrospective_000602.html), I would have already gone through to the other side.

Must find out if I'm Maximillian, or that little fag V.I.N.CENT.

[Peotr]

Back to previous thought (on Fortune Flakes) -

How in the hell does a person convince the general consumer that tiny pieces of paper inside sweet, vanilla-tasting cookie crisps is actually tasty in milk?

They could be ... low fat paper? High in fiber? Made from 100% recycled wood pulp?

Maybe we can make them vitamin enriched...

-- Peotr

Still, there's no getting around that tiny bits of paper in your teeth is going to be fucked up on your toothbrush, thats just not right.

[Peotr]

.....


WHO KEEPS READING THIS THREAD????

This is seriously freaking me out.

[Peotr]

At work - an ideal time to continue to PL my threadcount.

So far, no babes have come by craving my attention.

Perhaps ... perhaps they do not yet know I am here. Maybe some shiny stars on the door will help.

[Peotr]

My boss comes into my office as I PL my post count.

He stands behind me, looking over my shoulder as I type this.

My world is existential - proof that the environment we inhabit eventually conforms to fit the personality of that space.

I hear my boss say, "Tony, what the fuck are you doing?"

Life around me is definitely weird. But full of deep thoughts.

[Peotr]

Still no page 3.

All great threads eventually hit page 3. This one could, perhaps, be the greatest of all those.

[Peotr]

My boss has left. I have another brief interuption, this time from Chuck, who oversees all of our in-house cabling for telephones and IP.

Chuck is known as "The Fiber Guy". We imagine him as a super-hero.

"Hi - I'm Chuck, the Fiber Guy. Time to lay some cable!"

So funny, on so many levels.


-- Peotr


P.S. Chuck stands behind me, reading over my shoulder, and says, "Tony, what the fuck are you doing?"

[Peotr]

Before I can post another PL, Brent stops by. WTF!

Brent is cool, though. I am not a fag, but I am a meterosexual, and so I can say with confidence in my sexuality that Brent, in spite of being horribly cursed with a wussy name, is in truth a babe-magnet. A guy's guy, he is the embodiment of athletic, clean, handsome, funny, and genuinely friendly.

He has a quirky yet powerful taste in clothes. He is physically fit - he can even bust a six-pack.

He has an aura that is a cross between George Clooney and John Goodman.

Women always watch him. Women always ask about him. We have a running joke about how long it takes a new female employee to ask, whether directly or in any roundabout fashion, if he is married.

I hate him. Mostly because he has THE POWER, and yet, at the tender age of 27, he has been happily married for *9 years*.


-- Peotr

[Peotr]

Gratuitous bump while working.

[Peotr]

Well... Sort of working. Mostly working.

[Peotr]

Actually, I'm shopping for a 21" LCD.

I need a 21" LCD. Really.

I have no penis. And I already have about 85839042 computers.

[Peotr]

I need a life.

[Peotr]

Hmmm... vB Code does not work on these pages. Neither does HTML.

It doesn't appear to be anything in my settings. It is possible that they are turned off, since this board is rather dead.

Image test:

http://12.22.38.138/goofing/merc.gif

[Peotr]

SUXX0R!

My mojo is waning due to lack of code empowerishment!

My thread will have to be huge, since lack of vB power weakens me.

[Peotr]

DAMN!

The vile Vinen has caught me and EXPOSED MY PLAN FOR WORLD DOMINATION!

*sniff*

So much h8. The vile, Corvette driving administrators have reset my posts to zero. I sense them laughing at me, I sense them pointing at me and chortling, saying amongst themselves, "HAHA, we r0xx0r that n3wb!" as they show my lowly postcount to their women...

*sniff*

Must come up with new plan.

[Lola]

I think if anyone else posted on this thread, it would ruin it.

[Peotr]

!


~!


How did my name get on all these strange posts??

[Crimsonbanshee]

Coffee at night bad !

[Rika]

Oh wait! Now i see why your post count went to zero....

[Peotr]

Hi

This is the real Peotr. I'm not sure who posted all those other posts in this thread, but that person is SERIOUSLY DEMENTED. Wow! Fortunately a friend directed me here, and I am now here to clear up this mess.

You see, all these threads were posted by my brother, who was using my computer. I was actually out watching television, and just reading a book while cooking dinner, and he was using my computer. My brother is weird, he likes to powerlevel his post count, and pretend he's me, which is childish because really, who, besides babe-alicious women, give a fuck about your postcount?

Anyway, he's gone now. I'll try to be more careful about allowing him unsupervised access to my computer in the future, and I apologize about this entire thread.

-- Peotr (really)

P.S. I did notice, though, while I was at work, that I had a *shiney* star. I kinda liked that.

P.P.S. I promise you, I'm never letting my cousin near my computer again. Honest. I won't allow him to sully our boards with his foolishness! You can expect me to take DRASTIC and SEVERE measures to be sure that he doesn't get on my computer and cause this to happen again!

[Peotr]

I mean it!

I'm on the phone yelling at him right now!

Hear me yelling on the phone -

"YO, MARK! DO NOT FUCK AROUND ON MY COMPUTER AND ACCESS MY GUILD'S PRIVATE BOARDS AND DO CHILDISH POWERLEVEL POSTS TO GET SHINEY STARS AND MAKE ME LOOK BAD! YOU HEAR ME? I'LL TELL MOM YOU MASTURBATE!"

I mean it, this stuff really makes me angry. Next time I see him I'll kick his ass, too.

-- Peotr (real Peotr)

[Crimsonbanshee]

Powerleveling is bad

[Jasin!]

wheet dude you are so funny!

[Lexoon]

Peotr is, officially, my hero.