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Thread: Strange irony

  1. #1
    OMG! Kittens! Peotr's Avatar
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    Strange irony

    I was catching up on the news and read this on CNN. The article is about Mexican 'narcotanks', heavily armored trucks that the drug cartels are using in the Mexican drug wars.

    Quote Originally Posted by CNN
    Earlier this month, the Mexican army captured another armored vehicle, according to a report on BusinessInsider.com. That tank, dubbed El Monstruo 2011, was capable of going 68 mph and could carry 12 people behind its armor, the report said. It was seized in Ciudad Meir, where the Los Zetas gang has been battling over drug business with the Gulf Cartel, their former bosses, BusinessInsider said.
    Now ... What does it say about our society that a 24-hour news agency like CNN had to go to an online business magazine (Business Insider) to get information about the capture of a specialty vehicle made by drug cartels? And why IN THE FUCK is this business news????

    -- Peotr

    P.S. Trying to get this thought submitted to The Daily Show.

  2. #2
    LEGENDARY LOOT N SCOOT! Bakana's Avatar
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    haha good question

  3. #3
    PANTS!!!!!! Aindayen's Avatar
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    Peotr where have you been?
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  4. #4
    OMG! Kittens! Peotr's Avatar
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    I've been in the Land of the Lost.

    I've been (grudgingly) getting ready to move back to Orofino so I can take care of my parents. It's logical, since I'm the only one in the family who can do it. I've been strong through the last year, and my parents really don't need that much help.

    But about a month ago my dad went through some sudden fainting spells, which lead to some trips to the hospital, and they finally discovered that at age 84 he had 6 blocked arteries, a torn heart valve and chronic arrhythmia. At age 84 he had an open-fucking-heart surgery that included an angioplasty, 5 bypasses, a mechanical valve repair, and two heart ablations.

    Now, you might think my dad was in bad health, but at age 84 he still holds down three part-time jobs and he still bucks bales of hay over his head. I took the doctor aside and asked him if he wasn't at risk because of his age, and the doc looked at me and said, "Your dad's kidney, heart and liver functions are perfect for this operation. He's a near perfect candidate. He's a much better candidate than you are." Hey, thanks, doc.

    Everything about this adventure has been terrible and hysterical at the same time, from my mom, my dad and I stuffed in a clown car at 3 AM trying to deliver newspapers (don't ask), to my mom's dog getting run over by a grain truck (don't ask why thats funny, but Minny was 14 years old and looked exactly like Better's wiener dog), to the nurse in the Orofino hospital tripping over a power chord and almost smashing a $100,000.00 heart monitor (which was attached to my dad, and fell on her, fortunately), to the Russian night-nurse ("I'm here to check your whytals!"), to my dad and I getting into a laughing fit two days after surgery that lasted so long it set off the nurse's station alarms. And so I was kicked out of the cardiac ward and dad had to be taken back to CICU (Cardiac Intensive Care Unit). Apparently deep, sustained and uncontrollable laughter (the kind of laughter that makes it hard to breathe) two days after you've had your sternum sawn open for invasive heart surgery is bad for you. Who knew?

    The fainting episodes that lead to his diagnosis happened over two days, and for some reason my dad couldn't find it in him to pass out over anything but concrete. Nothing soft like carpet, or grass, or even gravel, each fucking time he passed out he was standing above a concrete surface, and he has these huge lumps on his head now.

    NOTE: Possible squeamish image below.




















    Amazing. It doesn't really show in the picture, but that lump is bigger than an egg. And I don't just mean two-dimensionally, it's rising out from his forehead higher than a fucking egg. I thought that only happened in cartoons. He's got another lump just like it on the back of his head. No damage from hitting his head, though. My father's family is built that way.

    Good times.

    -- Peotr

    P.S. Doctor's appointment tomorrow (for me). I've been sitting around doing online Sudoku, and each time I win I get a pop-up window from Match.com asking me to search for online singles in Moscow. And the list they give me of possibles is all male, which kind of pisses me off.

    P.P.S. A few of them are cute, though.

  5. #5
    PANTS!!!!!! Aindayen's Avatar
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    Your father sounds like a tank himself. Glad he's doing ok after all of that.

    Sounds like a rough year sir. I'm glad you're keeping in good spirits considering.

  6. #6
    Hoss Officer Phaera's Avatar
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    Omg did you run over my dog?! I miss you Peotr. Glad you're doing well (enough).

  7. #7
    PANTS!!!!!! Aindayen's Avatar
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    Phae knows you must take care of the weener or it will not take care of you.

  8. #8
    Hoss Officer / WoW Zeyla's Avatar
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    Glad you and your dad are doing well. Your writing always cracks me up. The way you describe normal and sometimes horrible things is just amazing. I still think you should write a comedy book.

  9. #9
    PANTS!!!!!! Aindayen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zeyla View Post
    Glad you and your dad are doing well. Your writing always cracks me up. The way you describe normal and sometimes horrible things is just amazing. I still think you should write a comedy book.
    Or a blog of sorts!

  10. #10
    Hoss Officer / WoW Zeyla's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Aindayen View Post
    Or a blog of sorts!
    Hey, that would work too!

  11. #11
    Andy, give the man a blog on here!!! The webtraffic would increase 100000 fold!
    Ab alio spectes alteri quod feceris






  12. #12
    MANGLING FACES in PVP. Kirynos's Avatar
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    Good to hear from you Peotr, regardless of the news. I heard laughter was the best medicine...

    ~Tapatalk'd from my Fascinate
    ~kiry... "Kiting Karana while 200 people rez" "Negative Attitude" "Demoralizing" "Uninvolved" "Stealing your Lunch Money!"

  13. #13
    Registered User Domathoine's Avatar
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    Peotr, you're continuing a tradition of finding ways to make me laugh in every one of your posts. Hope things go well for you. :-)

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