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Thread: Mi scusi

  1. #1
    Contagious Ktul's Avatar
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    Mi scusi

    Has anyone seen my retainer. peotr?

  2. #2
    OMG! Kittens! Peotr's Avatar
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    I know nothing of this 'retainer', although I still keep your spleen in a jar on my desk.

    P.S. If I remember correctly, I got your spleen somewhere in the Temple of Veeshan after it landed on Zag's face. I feel guilty about this - not about keeping your spleen, but stealing it from Zag. Zag was dead when I took it, though, so I suppose that's fair, but if I'm honest he died because I was supposed to be healing him, and if my memories are right I didn't heal him because I was so amazed by your spleen hitting his face. I believe that after Zag's death much wiping ensued, and if you know anything about us clerics we are diligent about healing the wounded, succoring the hurt, uplifting the downtrodden, speed camping when things go to shit, and occasionally casting invulnerability so we can loot stuff during a wipe.

    Someone accused me of causing that wipe by failing to heal Zag, but I was quick to point out that the wipe was, in fact, caused by your spleen, and I was able to derail the ensuing discussion far enough to keep everyone from asking why I failed to heal you.

    So I have your spleen. It is a cherished item, it feels wonderful in my fist, and no, I won't explain that.

    P.P.S. If anyone knows who has my spleen I'd love to have it back, or at least learn how it is being used.

    P.P.P.S. /manhugs

    P.P.P.P.S. Huzzah! SPLEEEE333EEEN!

    P.P.P.P.P.S. Yes, I'm still alive. I'm still out there. I still marvel at the passing of time. If you can believe it, in less than a week I will be 60 (sixty) years old.

    Fuck me. Sixty years old. Just ... fuck me.

    P.P.P.P.P.P.S. No, really - fuck me. Someone please come fuck me. I have spent the last 10 years caring for my parents (my dad is 94 and still kicking, and my nuts can't take much more of that), and I live in a remote town in Bumfuck, Nowhere, where I don't know a single person (even after 10 years).
    Last edited by Peotr; 11-27-2021 at 02:34 AM.

  3. #3
    I have a spare room and need a roommate. Houston,Texas and have fast wifi
    Teenagers are God's punishment for enjoying sex.

    Talk shit, get hit.

  4. #4
    Also peotr when we met I was 14. I'm 29 now. If that makes yoyou feel better
    Teenagers are God's punishment for enjoying sex.

    Talk shit, get hit.

  5. #5
    OMG! Kittens! Peotr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sabertootth View Post
    Also peotr when we met I was 14. I'm 29 now. If that makes yoyou feel better
    Oh, Sabertooth... Sadly, it cannot be. You see, I'm a caretaker for my parents, and although I'm sure your spare bedroom is nice, I really do need an entire two-story house to get far enough away from them when I've finished my chores.

    And on the matter of age, well... I'm 60 years old, single, and I live with my parents. That means one thing: I'm a pervert. And I'm afraid 29 is much too old for 60-year-old perverts. But we'll always have Paris Ulduar.


    P.S. How's things?

    P.P.S. Things are things here - I don't play online much anymore, but I still play single-player stealthers (Far Cry, Fallout, Dishonored, shit like that). When I was a young man I was certain that by the time I was 60 I would know how to clean my room, but I was mistaken.

    P.P.P.S. I also had this odd idea that when I turned 60 I would return to college, complete my divinity, and become a priest (true story). That hasn't turned out either - I swear / masturbate / fart / giggle / think bizarre thoughts waaaay too much for the priesthood. But perhaps, in these troubled times, I'm the priest this nation needs.

    P.P.P.P.S. Probably not, though. And I don't really pray. I mean, I do pray, but not really. I mostly just talk to God about why Bethesda screwed up Fallout '76 so bad, and why God keeps fucking with me while I'm trying to work on my truck (I'm restoring a '68 Dodge W100 shortbed utiline, and that's kinda fun. And I like to buy tools).


    Hope things are well with you. Isn't Houston supposed to be underwater after the next ice shelf breaks off the Antarctic?

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