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Thread: ATM Machines

  1. #1

    ATM Machines

    Out of the usual bombardment of male vs female emails that I get on a regular basis, I thought this one was cute

    ATM procedure for Males:

    1 - Drive up to the cash machine
    2 - Put down your car window
    3 - Insert card into machine and enter PIN
    4 - Enter amount of cash required and withdraw
    5 - Retrieve card, cash and receipt
    6 - Put Window up
    7 - Drive off

    ATM procedure for Females:

    1 - Drive up to cash machine
    2 - Reverse back the required amount to align car window to machine
    3 - Set parking break, put the window down
    4 - Find handbag, empty contents onto passenger seat to locate card
    5 - turn the radio down
    6 - Attempt to insert card into machine
    7 - Attempt to insert card into machine
    8 - Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car
    9 - Insert card
    10 - Re-insert card the right way up
    11 - Dig through handbag contents to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page
    12 - Enter PIN
    13 - Press Cancel and re-enter correct PIN
    14 - Enter amount of cash required
    15 - check make up in rear view window
    16 - retrieve cash and receipt
    17 - Search the other seat to locate wallet and place cash inside
    18 - Place receipt in back of checkbook
    19 - Re-check make up again
    20 - Drive forward 2 feet
    21 - Reverse back to machine
    22 - retrieve card
    23 - Re-empty handbag, locate card holder and place card inside
    24 - Give appropriate one-fingered hand signal to irate male drivers queuing behind
    25 - Restart stalled engine and pull out
    26 - drive for 2 or 3 mies
    27 - Release parking break

    hehe

  2. #2
    It's funny cause it's true!

    Honestly though, one thing that bugs the hell out of me with those drive through ATM's is people who are trying to use them as an exit from a parking lot. The one I always use, for some reason every idiot in the parking lot lines up behind me honking their horns because they want to just get out, and figure 30 seconds is too long to use an ATM for. However, generally daddy in the minivan shuts the fuck up if I even start to open my car door, so I at least have that satisfaction.

  3. #3
    I don't go to the drive through ones, but at the other ATM's I always get stuck behind the person who's too lazy to just go to an actual bank. They have to use the machine to make 3 or 4 seperate deposits, and then a withdrawl.

  4. #4
    WEEEEEEEEEE! Trazz's Avatar
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    I get the idiot that can't remember his PIN number, or takes 5 min to push the buttons.

    Drive up windows are evil. Dosn't matter how many cars are in each line, if there is one ahead of me, the idiot is sending the container back and fourth about 10 times.

    I don't even wait for a reciept..

    1 Drive up to bank
    2 put check and deposit slip in container and hit send
    3 drive away


    I have ZERO tolerance...

  5. #5
    Pika Pika Zeldapika's Avatar
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    I went into an atm last night, at my bank. I was done in 1 minute flat :P but there is this thing called being "polite" and like the unwritten law of "atm etiquette" where u kindly wait outside or at a far distance while the person gets what they need.

    I think this guy behind me was just pissed that i got to the atm before him hehe. Anyway, he proceeded to stand right up against me in that huge room like literally i could feel breath on muh shoulder >< wtf....i need personal space lol. I dont know what he was doing, i was like trying to hide my $$ while keeping an eye on him through the mirror. As i went to leave he's like "bye bye hehehehe" . wtf....people are messed-up
    Last edited by Zeldapika; 10-24-2002 at 01:29 PM.

  6. #6
    Contagious Ktul's Avatar
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    ZP I find a well positioned Fart/burp or a horrible hack will make people back off

  7. #7
    Tell Llain not to lean on you like that, that is just plain~ rude.

  8. #8
    Pika Pika Zeldapika's Avatar
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    Mar 2002
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    LOL

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